I've never been good at New Year's resolutions. The one year I actually sat down and wrote them out, I lost the sheet I wrote them on and forgot what they all were. So this really isn't my thing. But, after I found out that I would have to miss the Avett Brothers show on New Year's Eve in Asheville, I figured I'd get a chance to see them again in 2011 and all would be well, and then I started to think even more - I live just a few hours away from cities like Birmingham, New Orleans, Memphis, Nashville, Dallas, and Atlanta and most of my favorite bands frequently play in those cities. I also have friends in almost all of those cities that I don't see all too often and would like to see more. THEN I realized my class schedule was entirely Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday with no Monday or Friday classes so there would be plenty of opportunities to visit these cities to visit people and go to shows. So, for me, hopefully 2011 will be the year of the concert for me. This list will probably grow in length because these are all the people I can come up with offhand. In 2011, I want to see:
Jimmy Eat World (February 19, Oxford)
The Avett Brothers (April 16, Dallas)
Mumford & Sons
Old Crow Medicine Show
Yonder Mountain String Band
NEEDTOBREATHE
The Dirty Guv'nahs
Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors
Wild Sweet Orange
Again...this list isn't definitive, but I want to see as many concerts as possible this year. I've already got tickets to Jimmy Eat World and The Avett Brothers, so it'll be interesting to see how many of these work out.
Happy New Year
-chanchan
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Hey! Unto You a Child is Born!
Today, as I was taking a shower, Drew and Ellie Holcomb's cover of "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" came on and naturally, being a Christmas song, I sang along. As I was singing along, a line in the song that I've sung a million times in my life really hit me in a way it never has before. It's the line "peace on earth and mercy mild, God and sinners reconciled." And it hit me what it was saying. God, the creator of everything that has ever been or ever will be and everything we have seen and haven't...and sinners, me, who is selfish, lustful, arrogant, lazy...every other negative thing you can probably come up with...reconciled. The song rang especially true today, especially after I made a fool of myself yet again.
But then I started thinking of Christmas songs in general. And I mean...Christmas songs that are actually Christmas songs. The ones that proclaim the coming of Christ. While there are a lot of good ones that don't have anything to do Christ, those don't really make me stop and think. And after thinking about it, it makes me kinda sad that we don't sing these songs year round. They proclaim truths that we constantly need to be reminded of.
I mean, think about it. "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" is one of them. "Joy to the World!" talks about earth receiving her king and hearts preparing him room. And one of the sucky parts about growing up Southern Baptist is that we either don't sing hymns anymore or skip out the third stanza of hymns, and just now am I seeing the third stanza of "Joy to the World." It goes like this:
No more let sins and sorrows grow
Nor thorns infest the ground;
He comes to make his blessings flow
Far as the curse is found,
Far as the curse is found
Far as, far as, the curse is found
Whoa! That is phenomenal...the truth proclaimed here is just amazing. I mean, I really can't even put my thoughts into words right now. Think about this wicked, evil, screwed up world we live in. Shoot, think about yourself, and the crap in your own life. And here, with the coming of the Savior, the blessings flow as far as the curse of sin is found. Which is everywhere.
More than that, though..."O Come O Come Emmanuel." That one's pretty heavy. It proclaims a lot of the different names of Jesus, starting off with "Emmanuel" - God with us. Which kinda goes back to the theme of "Hark the Herald" - God dwelt among sinners. God...dwelt...among...sinners.
Think about "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" - one of my all time favorites. It tells tells the story of the coming of Christ, and then encourages believers with "tidings of comfort and joy." Because that is the ultimate comfort - realizing that:
For Jesus Christ our Saviour
Was born upon this day,
To save us all from Satan's power
When we were gone astray
There's no other comfort in this entire world. That blows my mind.
And this - the poem that "O Holy Night" is based on...
Midnight, Christians, it is the solemn hour,
When God-man descended to us
To erase the stain of original sin
And to end the wrath of His Father.
The entire world thrills with hope
On this night that gives it a Savior.
People kneel down, wait for your deliverance.
Christmas, Christmas, here is the Redeemer,
Christmas, Christmas, here is the Redeemer!
The ardent light of our Faith,
Guides us all to the cradle of the infant,
As in ancient times a brilliant star
Guiding the Oriental kings.
The King of Kings was born in a humble manger;
O mighty ones of today, proud of your grandeur,
It is to your pride that God preaches.
Bow your heads before the Redeemer!
Bow your heads before the Redeemer!
The Redeemer has overcome every obstacle:
The Earth is free, and Heaven is open.
He sees a brother where there was only a slave,
Love unites those that iron had chained.
Who will tell Him of our gratitude,
For all of us He is born, He suffers and dies.
People stand up! Sing of your deliverance,
Christmas, Christmas, sing of the Redeemer,
Christmas, Christmas, sing of the Redeemer!
Man. I didn't even know that before I started doing a little research to write this. I mean...I'm speechless.
And there are more. Think about "Away in a Manger" or "Silent Night." Obviously there's Handel's "Messiah" and the "For Unto us a Child is Born" movement. The list goes on.
So I guess I am writing this just to encourage anyone who may be reading this to really think about the words to the songs you sing this Christmas. Realize that these are praise songs - songs that proclaim the birth of our Savior. It really blew my mind to sit down and think about it today. Listen to them, think about them, reflect on them...but don't just sing them because they're "seasonal" or whatever.
Finally, I can't ever experience this time of year without thinking of the glorious time I got to spend as Ralph Herdman in "The Best Christmas Pageant Ever" and how much fun that was. I think my favorite part of the whole thing is when Gladys runs in, as the angel, and yells "HEY! UNTO YOU A CHILD IS BORN!"
Because ultimately, that's the message of Christmas. A series of events that would forever change everything. And it all started with that proclamation.
Merry Christmas!
-chanchan
But then I started thinking of Christmas songs in general. And I mean...Christmas songs that are actually Christmas songs. The ones that proclaim the coming of Christ. While there are a lot of good ones that don't have anything to do Christ, those don't really make me stop and think. And after thinking about it, it makes me kinda sad that we don't sing these songs year round. They proclaim truths that we constantly need to be reminded of.
I mean, think about it. "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" is one of them. "Joy to the World!" talks about earth receiving her king and hearts preparing him room. And one of the sucky parts about growing up Southern Baptist is that we either don't sing hymns anymore or skip out the third stanza of hymns, and just now am I seeing the third stanza of "Joy to the World." It goes like this:
No more let sins and sorrows grow
Nor thorns infest the ground;
He comes to make his blessings flow
Far as the curse is found,
Far as the curse is found
Far as, far as, the curse is found
Whoa! That is phenomenal...the truth proclaimed here is just amazing. I mean, I really can't even put my thoughts into words right now. Think about this wicked, evil, screwed up world we live in. Shoot, think about yourself, and the crap in your own life. And here, with the coming of the Savior, the blessings flow as far as the curse of sin is found. Which is everywhere.
More than that, though..."O Come O Come Emmanuel." That one's pretty heavy. It proclaims a lot of the different names of Jesus, starting off with "Emmanuel" - God with us. Which kinda goes back to the theme of "Hark the Herald" - God dwelt among sinners. God...dwelt...among...sinners.
Think about "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" - one of my all time favorites. It tells tells the story of the coming of Christ, and then encourages believers with "tidings of comfort and joy." Because that is the ultimate comfort - realizing that:
For Jesus Christ our Saviour
Was born upon this day,
To save us all from Satan's power
When we were gone astray
There's no other comfort in this entire world. That blows my mind.
And this - the poem that "O Holy Night" is based on...
Midnight, Christians, it is the solemn hour,
When God-man descended to us
To erase the stain of original sin
And to end the wrath of His Father.
The entire world thrills with hope
On this night that gives it a Savior.
People kneel down, wait for your deliverance.
Christmas, Christmas, here is the Redeemer,
Christmas, Christmas, here is the Redeemer!
The ardent light of our Faith,
Guides us all to the cradle of the infant,
As in ancient times a brilliant star
Guiding the Oriental kings.
The King of Kings was born in a humble manger;
O mighty ones of today, proud of your grandeur,
It is to your pride that God preaches.
Bow your heads before the Redeemer!
Bow your heads before the Redeemer!
The Redeemer has overcome every obstacle:
The Earth is free, and Heaven is open.
He sees a brother where there was only a slave,
Love unites those that iron had chained.
Who will tell Him of our gratitude,
For all of us He is born, He suffers and dies.
People stand up! Sing of your deliverance,
Christmas, Christmas, sing of the Redeemer,
Christmas, Christmas, sing of the Redeemer!
Man. I didn't even know that before I started doing a little research to write this. I mean...I'm speechless.
And there are more. Think about "Away in a Manger" or "Silent Night." Obviously there's Handel's "Messiah" and the "For Unto us a Child is Born" movement. The list goes on.
So I guess I am writing this just to encourage anyone who may be reading this to really think about the words to the songs you sing this Christmas. Realize that these are praise songs - songs that proclaim the birth of our Savior. It really blew my mind to sit down and think about it today. Listen to them, think about them, reflect on them...but don't just sing them because they're "seasonal" or whatever.
Finally, I can't ever experience this time of year without thinking of the glorious time I got to spend as Ralph Herdman in "The Best Christmas Pageant Ever" and how much fun that was. I think my favorite part of the whole thing is when Gladys runs in, as the angel, and yells "HEY! UNTO YOU A CHILD IS BORN!"
Because ultimately, that's the message of Christmas. A series of events that would forever change everything. And it all started with that proclamation.
Merry Christmas!
-chanchan
Monday, December 6, 2010
Don't Be An Idiot
This post is mostly meant to psych me up for the next seven days.
Sometimes I reflect on advice people have given me. Some of this is good advice and some of this is bad advice. They both tend to be comical at times, but the truth underneath it is undeniable. I honestly can't recall the worst advice anyone ever gave me, but when I think about the best advice anyone has ever given me, I think back to the summer of 2007 when I served on Summer Staff at Malibu in Egmont, British Columbia. That's where Kristin Barwick told me "Don't be a idiot." (Yes, she said "don't be a idiot" not "an idiot") And as I sit here staring finals down, knowing myself, these words ring incredibly true.
Don't be an idiot.
What spurred this post is irrelevant. The thing I have to remember about these next 7 days is that I really do, truly, honestly believe that I am where God has me in life. Yeah, finals will be tough, yeah, I did a great deal of procrastinating during the semester, and yeah, I've probably made it a little bit more difficult than it needs to be, but it's still doable. But in this time, I can't be an idiot. Yes, I would probably rather play video games or watch TV. Yes, I would probably rather read some of the books I've bought lately NOT for school. Yes, I would probably rather spend time with my friends or playing outside with the dogs. Yes, I would probably rather be doing anything right now but studying. But it's a week. One week. One week where I know what needs to get done, one week to finish strong.
Don't be an idiot.
Yes, I tend to get worked up/freaked out/upset about little things that people probably shouldn't get worked up/freaked out/upset about. This is not the time for that. Situations will work themselves out.
But the biggest part about "don't be an idiot," to me, right now, is that at times like this I typically tend to not trust God at all. I mean, that's where the freak out stuff comes from. Because I think the way I want things to happen is the way they SHOULD happen, and then when they don't work out that way (or work out that way as quickly as I'd like them to) I lose my mind. Which is why this extends beyond finals and into every aspect of my life. So, when I think about the best way that "don't be an idiot" applies to my life, it just speaks to the idea that I would trust in myself, the neurotic, sometimes-lazy, frequent jerk who is quick to speak and maybe quicker to anger over the sovereign God who sees and knows all, who intimately knows me in ways I don't know myself, who planned this very moment and sees my life 5, 10, 15, and 50 years down the road. The God who knows my wife already, knows what my kids will look like, knows the next car I'll get, knows all of the things I have pent up inside me that may never see the light of day but loves me anyway. And the God who, for some reason, called me to this very time.
So why do I worry? It reminds me of Jon Foreman's song "Your Love is Strong" - Why do I worry? Why do I freak out? God knows what I need...and he's promised to give it to me. I can stand on that promise, knowing it won't always be easy, but knowing that God is good. And he has a plan through all of this.
Don't be an idiot.
Until next time,
-chanchan
PS - listening to Gillian Welch's "Revival" - fan-freaking-tastic album. Love it.
Sometimes I reflect on advice people have given me. Some of this is good advice and some of this is bad advice. They both tend to be comical at times, but the truth underneath it is undeniable. I honestly can't recall the worst advice anyone ever gave me, but when I think about the best advice anyone has ever given me, I think back to the summer of 2007 when I served on Summer Staff at Malibu in Egmont, British Columbia. That's where Kristin Barwick told me "Don't be a idiot." (Yes, she said "don't be a idiot" not "an idiot") And as I sit here staring finals down, knowing myself, these words ring incredibly true.
Don't be an idiot.
What spurred this post is irrelevant. The thing I have to remember about these next 7 days is that I really do, truly, honestly believe that I am where God has me in life. Yeah, finals will be tough, yeah, I did a great deal of procrastinating during the semester, and yeah, I've probably made it a little bit more difficult than it needs to be, but it's still doable. But in this time, I can't be an idiot. Yes, I would probably rather play video games or watch TV. Yes, I would probably rather read some of the books I've bought lately NOT for school. Yes, I would probably rather spend time with my friends or playing outside with the dogs. Yes, I would probably rather be doing anything right now but studying. But it's a week. One week. One week where I know what needs to get done, one week to finish strong.
Don't be an idiot.
Yes, I tend to get worked up/freaked out/upset about little things that people probably shouldn't get worked up/freaked out/upset about. This is not the time for that. Situations will work themselves out.
But the biggest part about "don't be an idiot," to me, right now, is that at times like this I typically tend to not trust God at all. I mean, that's where the freak out stuff comes from. Because I think the way I want things to happen is the way they SHOULD happen, and then when they don't work out that way (or work out that way as quickly as I'd like them to) I lose my mind. Which is why this extends beyond finals and into every aspect of my life. So, when I think about the best way that "don't be an idiot" applies to my life, it just speaks to the idea that I would trust in myself, the neurotic, sometimes-lazy, frequent jerk who is quick to speak and maybe quicker to anger over the sovereign God who sees and knows all, who intimately knows me in ways I don't know myself, who planned this very moment and sees my life 5, 10, 15, and 50 years down the road. The God who knows my wife already, knows what my kids will look like, knows the next car I'll get, knows all of the things I have pent up inside me that may never see the light of day but loves me anyway. And the God who, for some reason, called me to this very time.
So why do I worry? It reminds me of Jon Foreman's song "Your Love is Strong" - Why do I worry? Why do I freak out? God knows what I need...and he's promised to give it to me. I can stand on that promise, knowing it won't always be easy, but knowing that God is good. And he has a plan through all of this.
Don't be an idiot.
Until next time,
-chanchan
PS - listening to Gillian Welch's "Revival" - fan-freaking-tastic album. Love it.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Redemption...or...something
I'm a sports fan. This shouldn't come as a shocking revelation to anyone that knows me, but in case it does serve as a shocking revelation to anyone, I'm just laying it out there. I love sports, particularly basketball and football. I dabble a little in baseball and will occasionally watch golf if the storylines are compelling behind whatever tournament is on. A little while back, I asked myself "why?" Why do I like sports so much? Why am I perfectly content with spending an entire Saturday and an entire Sunday doing nothing but watching football? Why am I willing to drive 2 and a half hours to Oxford to watch a 2 hour basketball game and drive 2 and a half hours back home in the same day? And the thing is, I really don't have an answer. Part of it is because I grew up playing sports. From September to July every year, I spent my time playing basketball then moving on to baseball. I was never really a stand out at anything, but I just liked playing.
But for the last couple of years, my interest in sports piqued to a whole new level. When I think back over the last few years, as it pertains to sports, there have been a couple of incredibly compelling stories. To me, Josh Hamilton's story is probably the best story in all of sports. There are a lot of good ones to choose from, and a lot of stories that resonate with me (I mean, come on. I practically WAS Rudy for my high school basketball team. But being one of the worst players on a Mississippi private school basketball team doesn't hold the same appeal as being a walk on for one of the most storied programs in college football) but the story of Josh Hamilton is incredible. Here you have a guy who literally had everything at his disposal. He was one of the top baseball players in his draft class and was considered a once in a lifetime talent. Then he got hooked on drugs and was literally homeless for a little while, then came to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ, cleaned his life up, and now is one of the best players in Major League Baseball. On top of that, he's not perfect. So many times we hold these guys (athletes, singers, actors, pastors, whatever...) to a standard no one except for Christ himself could uphold. But when he does screw up, he admits it. And he isn't ashamed to talk about Christ through all of it.
But why does that story touch me in such a way? Simple: redemption. And it's not just about sports. I've never met the guy, but I'm sure Josh Hamilton would tell you that if you took the baseball, the money, the fame, and all that away, as long as he still had Christ he'd be fine. But the redemptive aspect of his story rings true in all of us. We WANT a guy like that to succeed, because it gives us hope in our own lives.
It's the same reason we love the story of the Prodigal Son. We've all been there - maybe it wasn't drugs. Maybe it was sex. Pornography. Alcohol. Depression. Broken relationships. We've all been there - hopeless, lost, and past the point of "trying harder." We've reached the point where we've given up all hope and understood the weight of our own brokenness and come to the realization that there's nothing we can do about it.
The beauty about that situation for Christians is that we realize there never was anything we could do about it. It's not about whether or not we can pull ourselves back up by our bootstraps, but it's about what Christ did on the cross for us. We can't exactly explain it, but it comes down to what Josh Hamilton said about his own story - "It's a God thing." The Prodigal Son remembered his father's goodness and knew that even his servants ate and lived better than he was. He knew he wasn't worthy to be called his father's son anymore, but knew his father to be a compassionate man and hoped for the chance.
So, yeah, we want that story to be true. We want those things to happen, because they give us hope. As much as I love seminary, I get caught up in it a lot of times and forget those times when things seemed hopeless and only Christ would be my way out. I like the thought of being able to sound smart and theologize this and rationalize that so much that I often forget that it's not about being smarter or theologizing or rationalizing. It's about faith - faith in God, faith in Christ - and trusting in him and him alone. I think one of the most profound statements in the Bible is in the story of the blind man in John 9. Jesus heals the guy, giving him sight for the first time. When the Pharisees got a hold of him and questioned him about it, they asked if Jesus was a sinner. The blind man responded in John 9:25 saying "Whether he is a sinner, I do not know. One thing I know, that though I was blind, now I see."
I don't know. Maybe this whole thing is a stretch. Maybe finals and papers have fried my brain in such a way that literally anything would make sense right now (wouldn't be the first time...) but seeing stories of redemption like that awaken something in me. Something I want and need to believe is true. And something that I know is true.
-chanchan
Monday, November 1, 2010
Ramblings and Sundry Observations
After a relatively long dry spell, I'm writing my second blog in three days. I love it when my mind is working overtime like this. I've been thinking about a lot of things, so I'm just going to write them down and see what happens. And sadly it gets political. Sorry.
-Driving back from class tonight, Jars of Clay's cover of Rich Mullins' "If I Stand" came on my iPod. I absolutely love this song. Rich Mullins had to have been one of the most gifted songwriters ever and I'm sad he's no longer with us. That song is so incredible - if you don't know it, listen to it. Reflect upon it. It's seriously good stuff.
-The weather is finally changing. To me, this means a lot of things, but one of my favorite things it means is basketball season is upon us! Sadly, my white boy 6'3" center skills did not lead to any post high school playing time (or actual high school playing time), but the love for the game has never left me. And about this time I start to get nostalgic and just downright ready to watch college hoops.
-Tomorrow is an election day. I never know what to think on days like this as far as who to vote for and why or anything like that, but I do have a few thoughts to offer up:
1. This time it takes on a whole new meaning. I have two very close friends, one who recently finished basic training for the National Guard and another who just left for basic training for the Marine Corps, who are now involved with the armed forces. I've never really been in that situation before - I've never even really had family members who have served (since I've been alive - several of my great uncles and my grandfathers served in WWII) so basic freedoms like that are maybe starting to take on a new meaning. I've never really been too keen on voting, to tell the truth, because it seems like the choices are always either terrible or the same (or both). But now, I guess it does take on a new meaning.
2. Please keep in mind whoever you vote for isn't perfect. They're going to make mistakes, they're going to drop the ball on some issues...it's just how it works.
3. Ask hard questions. I really do get frustrated when, in the midst of a war, crazy economic times, and bills like the health care bill are being pushed on us, politicians talk about things that aren't important. We're in a time when we need difficult answers and honesty and not pandering to the religious or patriotic or things like that.
4. Don't be afraid to do what you think is right - I think we live in such a polarized time that we get so worked up against good ideas just because they come from the wrong side and we miss out.
So, if you're going to vote, do it intelligently. Don't vote Republican or Democrat just because it's what you've always done. We live in a time when information is available literally everywhere so there's no reason to not be informed.
-I'M GOING TO SEE THE AVETT BROTHERS ON NEW YEAR'S EVE IN NORTH CAROLINA!!!!!!! UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!!!! (I'm a tad bit excited about that piece...)
-Lately I've been listening to a lot of:
1. Mumford & Sons - Sigh No More
2. Lecrae - Rehab
3. MXPX - all of it
4. The Avett Brothers - again, all of it
5. Joshua Radin - he's good. Listen to him.
-Finally, in just thinking about life in general, stuff's good. I have to ask myself, in the midst of all of this, what is God teaching me? He's obviously keeping certain things out of my life right now for a reason, or reasons - everything happens for a reason - but what is it/are they? Last Tuesday during Bible study I came across a couple of passages - both in Luke.
1. Luke 9:23-27 - this is the "take up your cross daily" passage, and I've been thinking a lot about what that looks like in my own life. At this point, I'm not 100% sure. It's something I'm praying a lot about, but it'd be much easier if somebody just wrote down the instructions and handed them all out to us - but then again, that would take the fun out of life!
2. Luke 10:17-20 - this is an interesting passage. Jesus commissioned 72 people to go out and preach and cast out demons, and they did. In verses 17-20, we see the story of them returning and they are pretty stoked about casting out demons, but Jesus tells them not to rejoice in that, but to rejoice in the fact that their names are written in the book of life! That really stood out to me - a lot of times we rejoice in our own successes, whether "spiritual" or not, but the thing we are to rejoice in, just as Jesus told the 72, is our salvation! And I got to thinking about that - that's true joy. Even in spite of great things or awful things happening, our joy is in the Lord and what he did for us on the cross. It really puts things into perspective.
So that's it. Just a pretty random assortment of thoughts, but I didn't want to let any of them get away. So there they are.
<3 chanchan
-Driving back from class tonight, Jars of Clay's cover of Rich Mullins' "If I Stand" came on my iPod. I absolutely love this song. Rich Mullins had to have been one of the most gifted songwriters ever and I'm sad he's no longer with us. That song is so incredible - if you don't know it, listen to it. Reflect upon it. It's seriously good stuff.
-The weather is finally changing. To me, this means a lot of things, but one of my favorite things it means is basketball season is upon us! Sadly, my white boy 6'3" center skills did not lead to any post high school playing time (or actual high school playing time), but the love for the game has never left me. And about this time I start to get nostalgic and just downright ready to watch college hoops.
-Tomorrow is an election day. I never know what to think on days like this as far as who to vote for and why or anything like that, but I do have a few thoughts to offer up:
1. This time it takes on a whole new meaning. I have two very close friends, one who recently finished basic training for the National Guard and another who just left for basic training for the Marine Corps, who are now involved with the armed forces. I've never really been in that situation before - I've never even really had family members who have served (since I've been alive - several of my great uncles and my grandfathers served in WWII) so basic freedoms like that are maybe starting to take on a new meaning. I've never really been too keen on voting, to tell the truth, because it seems like the choices are always either terrible or the same (or both). But now, I guess it does take on a new meaning.
2. Please keep in mind whoever you vote for isn't perfect. They're going to make mistakes, they're going to drop the ball on some issues...it's just how it works.
3. Ask hard questions. I really do get frustrated when, in the midst of a war, crazy economic times, and bills like the health care bill are being pushed on us, politicians talk about things that aren't important. We're in a time when we need difficult answers and honesty and not pandering to the religious or patriotic or things like that.
4. Don't be afraid to do what you think is right - I think we live in such a polarized time that we get so worked up against good ideas just because they come from the wrong side and we miss out.
So, if you're going to vote, do it intelligently. Don't vote Republican or Democrat just because it's what you've always done. We live in a time when information is available literally everywhere so there's no reason to not be informed.
-I'M GOING TO SEE THE AVETT BROTHERS ON NEW YEAR'S EVE IN NORTH CAROLINA!!!!!!! UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!!!! (I'm a tad bit excited about that piece...)
-Lately I've been listening to a lot of:
1. Mumford & Sons - Sigh No More
2. Lecrae - Rehab
3. MXPX - all of it
4. The Avett Brothers - again, all of it
5. Joshua Radin - he's good. Listen to him.
-Finally, in just thinking about life in general, stuff's good. I have to ask myself, in the midst of all of this, what is God teaching me? He's obviously keeping certain things out of my life right now for a reason, or reasons - everything happens for a reason - but what is it/are they? Last Tuesday during Bible study I came across a couple of passages - both in Luke.
1. Luke 9:23-27 - this is the "take up your cross daily" passage, and I've been thinking a lot about what that looks like in my own life. At this point, I'm not 100% sure. It's something I'm praying a lot about, but it'd be much easier if somebody just wrote down the instructions and handed them all out to us - but then again, that would take the fun out of life!
2. Luke 10:17-20 - this is an interesting passage. Jesus commissioned 72 people to go out and preach and cast out demons, and they did. In verses 17-20, we see the story of them returning and they are pretty stoked about casting out demons, but Jesus tells them not to rejoice in that, but to rejoice in the fact that their names are written in the book of life! That really stood out to me - a lot of times we rejoice in our own successes, whether "spiritual" or not, but the thing we are to rejoice in, just as Jesus told the 72, is our salvation! And I got to thinking about that - that's true joy. Even in spite of great things or awful things happening, our joy is in the Lord and what he did for us on the cross. It really puts things into perspective.
So that's it. Just a pretty random assortment of thoughts, but I didn't want to let any of them get away. So there they are.
<3 chanchan
Sunday, October 31, 2010
What Changed?
As I sit here reflecting on a great night, I have to ask myself - what changed? Anybody who really knew me knew how miserable I was in Oxford, especially the last 6 months I was there. I even had a hard time coming back for basketball games during the winter, and I LOVE basketball. I had a countdown clock literally counting down the minutes until I got to move home, and I couldn't even wait to get home on basketball weekends after visiting.
On top of that, this football season has been pretty miserable. So why am I sitting here, in Oxford, ridiculously happy? Being in the Grove today, going to the game, going to the Square after the game...it's just good. I got to see all kinds of people - college friends, grown friends, friends from back home, and I got a great chance to talk about what God is doing in my life right now and how ridiculously good he is even when I don't deserve it. Now, instead of "man, I can't wait to get home" I'm thinking "man, I wish I could stay a few extra days!" Why? What changed?
I really have no idea.
I just know my spirit is completely renewed. I'm still not where I need to be, but I can feel my heart changing. The shift from being a "believer" to being a "disciple" is beginning (I hope and think) and some things in scripture and in school are starting to make sense in ways that they never really have before. So maybe it's just being in a better place with God right now, but whatever this change is, I like it.
Oh, and Happy Halloween. Enjoy the day. It's a fun one.
<3 chanchan
On top of that, this football season has been pretty miserable. So why am I sitting here, in Oxford, ridiculously happy? Being in the Grove today, going to the game, going to the Square after the game...it's just good. I got to see all kinds of people - college friends, grown friends, friends from back home, and I got a great chance to talk about what God is doing in my life right now and how ridiculously good he is even when I don't deserve it. Now, instead of "man, I can't wait to get home" I'm thinking "man, I wish I could stay a few extra days!" Why? What changed?
I really have no idea.
I just know my spirit is completely renewed. I'm still not where I need to be, but I can feel my heart changing. The shift from being a "believer" to being a "disciple" is beginning (I hope and think) and some things in scripture and in school are starting to make sense in ways that they never really have before. So maybe it's just being in a better place with God right now, but whatever this change is, I like it.
Oh, and Happy Halloween. Enjoy the day. It's a fun one.
<3 chanchan
Monday, October 4, 2010
Confidence
Lately, God has been working on my heart in a number of ways. He's shown me some things I'm good at, shown me some things I suck at, told me NO rather emphatically on something I had gotten my hopes up for, and allowed me to be perfectly and totally content for no apparent reason. One of these things struck me in a sermon from two weeks ago, the evening service at Crossgates Baptist Church on September 26th.
I'm not a Greek scholar by any stretch (my Greek I average is pretty solid proof of that) but when it comes to the Bible I've always been pretty interested in what the original text said. That Sunday night, pastor Jett preached on Hebrews 4:16, which reads "Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Pastor Jett then said something about the Greek word used in that sentence, which turned out to be "parresia." The word (I'm not exactly sure how write it in Greek on here, so that's the best I can do for right now...) is a combination of the two words "pas"and "rhesis", which mean all and speech, act of speaking. That's actually completely different than what I expected the word confidence to mean, which in English means "the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust" and even that definition is not what I expected it to be.
What do you think of when you hear the word confidence? For whatever reason, I've always associated it with the self. For example, I have confidence in myself to go and make an A on a test or I used to have confidence in myself to be a pretty decent basketball player or I'm confident in my own personality so I can get a date with a girl. (For those that know me, those are three totally ridiculous examples!) But confidence to me has always been about me. Which is really weak because not a single one of us has anything to be confident about in and of ourselves. Which is exactly where the word started to mess with me.
I mean, I think about the things I have confidence in - I have confidence in my car to get me from point A to point B. I have confidence in my friends to show up and do what they say they are going to do. I have confidence in my hands when I play guitar. I have confidence in any number of things, unfortunately, all of those things are really not worth being confident in. My car breaks down. My friends sometimes bail. I'm not really that good at guitar. So, really and truly the only thing we can be confident in is Jesus Christ, because he's the only person that has ever walked the face of this earth and not let people down.
But I feel like the "confidence" cited in Hebrews 4:16 is a different kind of confidence. As I mentioned earlier, it literally means "all speech." So we, as believers, have an audience before the God and creator of the universe, and can approach his throne in all confidence. How ridiculous is that? Think about the Old Testament for a second. When the high priest went before God on the day of atonement, he had to make sure everything was just perfect before entering the Holy of Holies, and even in that, he had to tie a rope around his waist in case something were to go wrong and he were to die in the presence of God. It's not that God wanted to try to kill anyone or anything like that, but because of His holiness, things had to be a certain way. However, you and I as believers have that confidence.
The question becomes why? Why do we have that kind of confidence to go before the throne of grace? Well, the question is answered before we even get to Hebrews 4:16. In verses 14 and 15, Paul explains that we have that high priest who has passed through - Jesus Christ. And the coolest thing is verse 15 - "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin." So our confidence comes not only in Christ's blood, that he has atoned for our sins, but because he can totally relate to us in every way. He put aside his glory (just as the high priest put aside his elaborate garments to enter the Holy place) to come to earth and live amongst us.
Think about it this way, though. Back in those days, if a person was granted an audience before a person of power, they really didn't have that kind of confidence. He'd never know if the authority figure were in a bad mood or was just an evil person or couldn't relate or whatever. So, he could technically say whatever he wanted, but the authority figure could order his head cut off or his family killed or something crazy like that. But that's not how it is with our heavenly father. If we belong to him, we have that confidence! We can speak our minds because we have a high priest who relates to us in every way, yet still is perfect. Yet still came to earth, died on the cross, defeated death, and rose again.
There's a lot more to it than this, obviously, but reading the commentary I read (you can read it here) those were the things that stood out to me. It's a little bit more jumbled and rambling that I had hoped, but I just thought the word and the concept in general were both pretty cool.
-chandler
I'm not a Greek scholar by any stretch (my Greek I average is pretty solid proof of that) but when it comes to the Bible I've always been pretty interested in what the original text said. That Sunday night, pastor Jett preached on Hebrews 4:16, which reads "Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Pastor Jett then said something about the Greek word used in that sentence, which turned out to be "parresia." The word (I'm not exactly sure how write it in Greek on here, so that's the best I can do for right now...) is a combination of the two words "pas"and "rhesis", which mean all and speech, act of speaking. That's actually completely different than what I expected the word confidence to mean, which in English means "the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust" and even that definition is not what I expected it to be.
What do you think of when you hear the word confidence? For whatever reason, I've always associated it with the self. For example, I have confidence in myself to go and make an A on a test or I used to have confidence in myself to be a pretty decent basketball player or I'm confident in my own personality so I can get a date with a girl. (For those that know me, those are three totally ridiculous examples!) But confidence to me has always been about me. Which is really weak because not a single one of us has anything to be confident about in and of ourselves. Which is exactly where the word started to mess with me.
I mean, I think about the things I have confidence in - I have confidence in my car to get me from point A to point B. I have confidence in my friends to show up and do what they say they are going to do. I have confidence in my hands when I play guitar. I have confidence in any number of things, unfortunately, all of those things are really not worth being confident in. My car breaks down. My friends sometimes bail. I'm not really that good at guitar. So, really and truly the only thing we can be confident in is Jesus Christ, because he's the only person that has ever walked the face of this earth and not let people down.
But I feel like the "confidence" cited in Hebrews 4:16 is a different kind of confidence. As I mentioned earlier, it literally means "all speech." So we, as believers, have an audience before the God and creator of the universe, and can approach his throne in all confidence. How ridiculous is that? Think about the Old Testament for a second. When the high priest went before God on the day of atonement, he had to make sure everything was just perfect before entering the Holy of Holies, and even in that, he had to tie a rope around his waist in case something were to go wrong and he were to die in the presence of God. It's not that God wanted to try to kill anyone or anything like that, but because of His holiness, things had to be a certain way. However, you and I as believers have that confidence.
The question becomes why? Why do we have that kind of confidence to go before the throne of grace? Well, the question is answered before we even get to Hebrews 4:16. In verses 14 and 15, Paul explains that we have that high priest who has passed through - Jesus Christ. And the coolest thing is verse 15 - "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin." So our confidence comes not only in Christ's blood, that he has atoned for our sins, but because he can totally relate to us in every way. He put aside his glory (just as the high priest put aside his elaborate garments to enter the Holy place) to come to earth and live amongst us.
Think about it this way, though. Back in those days, if a person was granted an audience before a person of power, they really didn't have that kind of confidence. He'd never know if the authority figure were in a bad mood or was just an evil person or couldn't relate or whatever. So, he could technically say whatever he wanted, but the authority figure could order his head cut off or his family killed or something crazy like that. But that's not how it is with our heavenly father. If we belong to him, we have that confidence! We can speak our minds because we have a high priest who relates to us in every way, yet still is perfect. Yet still came to earth, died on the cross, defeated death, and rose again.
There's a lot more to it than this, obviously, but reading the commentary I read (you can read it here) those were the things that stood out to me. It's a little bit more jumbled and rambling that I had hoped, but I just thought the word and the concept in general were both pretty cool.
-chandler
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
My Statement of Faith
I had to write this for a job I applied for, and I feel like it's an important thing everyone should do. I'm actually a bit sad that it took me 25 years to do it. These are just the basics.
Statement of Faith
Chandler Rowlen
I believe in the triune God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Each are separate entities, equal in power, yet distinct in their ministries. All three are co-eternal, none has a beginning nor an end.
I believe in God, the creator of everything. He is my heavenly Father, who has called me according to His purposes. He created the earth and man in His own image, perfect and in communion with Him. Man sinned, and through man sin entered the world, rendering all of mankind spiritually dead and helpless in that state, unable to contribute anything to salvation.
I believe God the Father sent Jesus Christ his son, who was both fully man and fully God, to redeem mankind by his sacrificial death upon the cross. He rose again on the third day so that not only would our sin be atoned for, but we would have everlasting life in Christ. His death was not exemplary, rather, it was sacrificial and necessary to atone for the sin of man. Just as sin entered the world through one man, so did life through Christ.
I believe God the Father sent the Holy Spirit to convict and guide His people in life. He is our guide and helper.
I believe in the Bible as God’s infallible word. It is divinely inspired and is the authority for doctrine, theology, and faith. It also serves as an example for how to live a Christian life.
I believe in the local church as a local body of believers seeking the will of Christ both in their personal lives and for the life of their community.
Statement of Faith
Chandler Rowlen
I believe in the triune God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Each are separate entities, equal in power, yet distinct in their ministries. All three are co-eternal, none has a beginning nor an end.
I believe in God, the creator of everything. He is my heavenly Father, who has called me according to His purposes. He created the earth and man in His own image, perfect and in communion with Him. Man sinned, and through man sin entered the world, rendering all of mankind spiritually dead and helpless in that state, unable to contribute anything to salvation.
I believe God the Father sent Jesus Christ his son, who was both fully man and fully God, to redeem mankind by his sacrificial death upon the cross. He rose again on the third day so that not only would our sin be atoned for, but we would have everlasting life in Christ. His death was not exemplary, rather, it was sacrificial and necessary to atone for the sin of man. Just as sin entered the world through one man, so did life through Christ.
I believe God the Father sent the Holy Spirit to convict and guide His people in life. He is our guide and helper.
I believe in the Bible as God’s infallible word. It is divinely inspired and is the authority for doctrine, theology, and faith. It also serves as an example for how to live a Christian life.
I believe in the local church as a local body of believers seeking the will of Christ both in their personal lives and for the life of their community.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
The Lining is...Silver?
I'm moody. Anybody who truly knows me knows this. Maybe you do really know me and I've managed to hide it from you. Maybe you don't know me. Maybe we just haven't been friends long enough for you to notice. But it's true - I'm moody. And I never know when I'm going to be moody. So there's my startling (not really) confession for the day.
Part of being moody is being frustrated, and I am REALLY good at being frustrated. Really good at it. And I'm also really good at not being able to deal with it. It's that time when you're bored or mad or whatever and nothing can fix it - I can't even find solace in playing guitar because I just wind up angry that I can't write a song or remember stuff from memory and I can't just do it. Music doesn't even work because I can't find anything that helps and then I do and it's just one song and my iTunes plays 850 other songs that I don't even like and it just gets more and more frustrating.
But, in the process of fast forwarding through a couple of hundred songs (really not an exaggeration) I came across Relient K's "The Lining is Silver". The chorus of the song says:
Isn't it nice to know
[Isn't it nice to know]
That the lining is silver
Isn't it nice to know
[Isn't it nice to know]
That we're golden
Yeah we're golden
Oh
And the answer is yeah, it is nice to know. But even though the lining is silver, it sucks to feel like you're constantly getting rained on.
Since I'm being honest, as I typically try to be on this thing, I'll just admit that these are the times I struggle with God and faith the most - that is to say, when things are just kind of average. Not good, not bad, things just kind of...are. These are the times the comparison bug kicks my tail up and down the sidewalk. And these are the times when words just aren't enough.
These are the times that I know I can quote a thousand Bible verses about God having a plan for us and for everything working for our good and how He's watching over us and these are the times that I don't believe them. At all. (And...for the record...I can say this here because I've already told God about it. He's big enough to handle it.) It's not that I don't believe in God. It's just that the words aren't enough. The silver lining isn't enough.
And who knows? Maybe this is a patience issue. Maybe it's the comparison thing. Maybe it's a faith issue. I don't know. I guess it helps to write about it.
-chandler
Part of being moody is being frustrated, and I am REALLY good at being frustrated. Really good at it. And I'm also really good at not being able to deal with it. It's that time when you're bored or mad or whatever and nothing can fix it - I can't even find solace in playing guitar because I just wind up angry that I can't write a song or remember stuff from memory and I can't just do it. Music doesn't even work because I can't find anything that helps and then I do and it's just one song and my iTunes plays 850 other songs that I don't even like and it just gets more and more frustrating.
But, in the process of fast forwarding through a couple of hundred songs (really not an exaggeration) I came across Relient K's "The Lining is Silver". The chorus of the song says:
Isn't it nice to know
[Isn't it nice to know]
That the lining is silver
Isn't it nice to know
[Isn't it nice to know]
That we're golden
Yeah we're golden
Oh
And the answer is yeah, it is nice to know. But even though the lining is silver, it sucks to feel like you're constantly getting rained on.
Since I'm being honest, as I typically try to be on this thing, I'll just admit that these are the times I struggle with God and faith the most - that is to say, when things are just kind of average. Not good, not bad, things just kind of...are. These are the times the comparison bug kicks my tail up and down the sidewalk. And these are the times when words just aren't enough.
These are the times that I know I can quote a thousand Bible verses about God having a plan for us and for everything working for our good and how He's watching over us and these are the times that I don't believe them. At all. (And...for the record...I can say this here because I've already told God about it. He's big enough to handle it.) It's not that I don't believe in God. It's just that the words aren't enough. The silver lining isn't enough.
And who knows? Maybe this is a patience issue. Maybe it's the comparison thing. Maybe it's a faith issue. I don't know. I guess it helps to write about it.
-chandler
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Oxford, Mississippi
Goodbyes suck.
Seriously. They do. As many times as I've had to participate in these dreadful events, you'd think they get easier. They don't.
Tonight, my good friend Curt Liles officially announced something we all knew - he's stepping down as the middle school pastor at Crossgates Baptist Church to head to Oxford to start a church. And though I knew it was coming, and have known for a couple of weeks, it wasn't an easy thing to hear, and it's something that probably won't set in for a while.
I haven't had the privilege of knowing Curt for very long, seeing as we officially met in January, but my mom (who is also on staff at CBC) has been telling me for quite some time that he and I would hit it off and that we are a lot alike. And over the past six months I've literally been scared at how similar we are. From our love for all things Ole Miss to video games to just the overall weirdness both of us possess, it is a bit scary. But it's the similarities that make this goodbye thing bittersweet instead of just bitter.
One of the biggest things we have in common is our heart for Oxford, Mississippi. People always say Ole Miss is the best 5 or 6 (or seven) years of your life, and there were definitely times that statement rang true for me. It's an amazing town that is always going to have a special place in my heart.
But Oxford is in need of something that's not there. For a town in the Bible belt, it's surprisingly dark. But I don't think it's a town that is hostile to the gospel - in fact I think it's hungry. And I think that when someone gets there and starts preaching AND living truth, it's going to spread like wildfire. I really believe that. I'm not saying that I think the churches there just suck and are failing and all of that, but I do know from experience the town needs something that's not currently there. It's frustrating to me because I spend a lot of time on Ole Miss message boards and whenever the issue for Sunday alcohol sales comes up, the Baptist churches go crazy and whip up a huge frenzy and vote it down and then they disappear again, and seeing people's reaction to all of this is heartbreaking because people just look and say "oh, Sunday sales are up for vote again, here come the Christians" and then "oh, Sunday sales got shot down again, there go the Christians." And it's frustrating.
Oxford needs a church that is going to be more than that. Part of why I loved RUF so much was because I felt like they were good in this area - both desiring truth and living a Christian life. Not just harping on alcohol, and not just trying to "live in the spirit" with no sense of direction or doctrine or truth, but finding the balance. And that's what I think Curt is going to do, but hopefully out of the university setting.
I also understand that it's not a complete and total goodbye. Oxford is still my home away from home and now I have yet another excuse/reason to go. I can't wait to see what God has in store for Curt, Stephanie, and Laney, and I can't wait to see what God has in store for Oxford. It's going to be big.
Also, for any of the Oxford peeps that happen to read this, be on the lookout. It's gonna get freaky real soon.
-chanchan
Seriously. They do. As many times as I've had to participate in these dreadful events, you'd think they get easier. They don't.
Tonight, my good friend Curt Liles officially announced something we all knew - he's stepping down as the middle school pastor at Crossgates Baptist Church to head to Oxford to start a church. And though I knew it was coming, and have known for a couple of weeks, it wasn't an easy thing to hear, and it's something that probably won't set in for a while.
I haven't had the privilege of knowing Curt for very long, seeing as we officially met in January, but my mom (who is also on staff at CBC) has been telling me for quite some time that he and I would hit it off and that we are a lot alike. And over the past six months I've literally been scared at how similar we are. From our love for all things Ole Miss to video games to just the overall weirdness both of us possess, it is a bit scary. But it's the similarities that make this goodbye thing bittersweet instead of just bitter.
One of the biggest things we have in common is our heart for Oxford, Mississippi. People always say Ole Miss is the best 5 or 6 (or seven) years of your life, and there were definitely times that statement rang true for me. It's an amazing town that is always going to have a special place in my heart.
But Oxford is in need of something that's not there. For a town in the Bible belt, it's surprisingly dark. But I don't think it's a town that is hostile to the gospel - in fact I think it's hungry. And I think that when someone gets there and starts preaching AND living truth, it's going to spread like wildfire. I really believe that. I'm not saying that I think the churches there just suck and are failing and all of that, but I do know from experience the town needs something that's not currently there. It's frustrating to me because I spend a lot of time on Ole Miss message boards and whenever the issue for Sunday alcohol sales comes up, the Baptist churches go crazy and whip up a huge frenzy and vote it down and then they disappear again, and seeing people's reaction to all of this is heartbreaking because people just look and say "oh, Sunday sales are up for vote again, here come the Christians" and then "oh, Sunday sales got shot down again, there go the Christians." And it's frustrating.
Oxford needs a church that is going to be more than that. Part of why I loved RUF so much was because I felt like they were good in this area - both desiring truth and living a Christian life. Not just harping on alcohol, and not just trying to "live in the spirit" with no sense of direction or doctrine or truth, but finding the balance. And that's what I think Curt is going to do, but hopefully out of the university setting.
I also understand that it's not a complete and total goodbye. Oxford is still my home away from home and now I have yet another excuse/reason to go. I can't wait to see what God has in store for Curt, Stephanie, and Laney, and I can't wait to see what God has in store for Oxford. It's going to be big.
Also, for any of the Oxford peeps that happen to read this, be on the lookout. It's gonna get freaky real soon.
-chanchan
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