As I sit here reflecting on a great night, I have to ask myself - what changed? Anybody who really knew me knew how miserable I was in Oxford, especially the last 6 months I was there. I even had a hard time coming back for basketball games during the winter, and I LOVE basketball. I had a countdown clock literally counting down the minutes until I got to move home, and I couldn't even wait to get home on basketball weekends after visiting.
On top of that, this football season has been pretty miserable. So why am I sitting here, in Oxford, ridiculously happy? Being in the Grove today, going to the game, going to the Square after the game...it's just good. I got to see all kinds of people - college friends, grown friends, friends from back home, and I got a great chance to talk about what God is doing in my life right now and how ridiculously good he is even when I don't deserve it. Now, instead of "man, I can't wait to get home" I'm thinking "man, I wish I could stay a few extra days!" Why? What changed?
I really have no idea.
I just know my spirit is completely renewed. I'm still not where I need to be, but I can feel my heart changing. The shift from being a "believer" to being a "disciple" is beginning (I hope and think) and some things in scripture and in school are starting to make sense in ways that they never really have before. So maybe it's just being in a better place with God right now, but whatever this change is, I like it.
Oh, and Happy Halloween. Enjoy the day. It's a fun one.
<3 chanchan
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